Hey Friends!
Preparations are being made! Slowly but surely, we are getting a clearer picture of what outreach could look like. In Nepal we will be spending our time in the capital city of Katmandu for about a month. Our duration in India is going to be about six weeks and will be spent in Dharamsala in the north. Plans are coming together for us to work with street kids ministries, in orphanages and sports camps. Another thing that YWAM is really big into is skits and plays. So, we'll probably be doing a lot of street dramas as a form of evangelism as well as bringing them to local churches along with our testimonies. it's about five weeks away and the reality is starting to set in. The closeness of the time is both thrilling and frightening.
Despite all that, this blog entry is not simply an information update as the last one was. I feel that I am deep enough into the DTS experience that it's time for me to really bare my heart, which is not an easy thing to do on the internet. However, I feel I owe this to the people who have supported me through finances and prayer, so that they may see the fruits of their contribution and somehow feel a part of this story.
The acronym DTS has many meanings. There's of course the official one: Discipleship Training School, then there's the one branded by rebel students: Don't Tell Staff, but the one I'm going to talk about was probably coined once people realized what this school was doing to those who took it and that is Die To Self.
Jesus's main teaching is for Christians to "Deny themselves and take up their cross and follow Me" (Matthew 16:24). This is a daily act of putting aside your own desires for the will of God and usually takes time to fabricate the ability. I honestly believe that there are very few situations that involve such a huge concentration of the teaching and act of self denial than a DTS. Constantly you are put into situations where you are stretched; stretched to deal with a relationship you didn't expect, stretched to clean up the messes of other people (literally, I'm in housekeeping for work duty), stretched to obey the word of a God who puts a request upon you so He can prove His faithfulness and most importantly, stretched to see the side of yourself that needs to be made clean because you can't go on living as a Christ follower once you've seen it.
At some point, I can't exactly remember when during this DTS, I prayed the "dangerous prayer". This goes something a little like "God, show me what I need to work on so I can be more like you." Usually after you pray, you don't think much at the time... until it comes up later. Over the month and a half that I've been here, God has been giving me revelation after revelation of the person that I really am at the core, fueled by pride, adoration who cries when she doesn't get her way. He's showing me areas of my past that needed to be dealt with if I'm ever to live freely. But what better time for all this then six months that I can completely devote to His ministry towards me?
Don't get me wrong, DTS is a lot of fun. It's an amazing, full of great relationships, and worth while experience that I know will only get more amplified once outreach kicks off, but it's heavy business. Personalities clash, speakers challenge the things you thought you knew and after so much you end up being spiritually drained, tired of processing, questioning and thinking. I find that this can be the time when God can do his best work, when you're out of your own reserves, He comes in and gives you peace. It's a time when you truly learn to rely on Him, not the things you turned to before which is a huge learning experience for me. It's dying to your human desires, dying to yourself, DTS.
Thanks for reading,
God bless!
~Kathleen
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